Scenes from an Italian Restaurant

Have you ever gone out to dinner and been seated near a family with little kids? Your first thought was probably "%@!#%, why do I always get stuck next to the crazy families??"

Well, tonight, we were that crazy family in the middle of the restaurant. And for future reference, just because you may have the same number of adults as babies at the table doesn't necessarily mean you are equally matched for the event.

All in all, it was a learning experience in many ways. So, without further ado, here are a few key lessons we'd like to pass along to others who may be contemplating a similar "adventure":

• Always have a backup sippy cup on hand. Fortunately, this time we did, as Tyler was very intrigued with the squishiness of his styrofoam kid's cup. In other words, no sippy cup equals one very milk-soaked toddler.

• If a little bowl of red sauce arrives with the kid's meal, remove it from the plate before the toddler spots it. We failed on this one. Watching him dunk the first noodle in it was cute. Watching him squish the rest of his meal into the little ketchup-filled bowl then proceed to "paint" the table was not.
  

• If you order fettucini that has peas in it, and your toddler loves peas, don't give him a taste of your meal - unless you want to spend the rest of your time spearing peas with your fork for the demanding pea-lover (who doesn't like anything else on your plate).
  

• Always keep a backup bottle of formula handy for the wee one. If you read my previous post, you know that milk can sometimes make an angry baby happy. Well, it didn't really work so well this time, but it did buy us a little time.
  

• If angry baby won't stop crying unless he's being held, let the fastest eater eat first... then trade off the baby and let the slower eater eat their meal. That way everyone has a good chance to eat while their meal is at least a little bit warm.
  

• If the toddler drops a big piece of bread on the floor, and you put it back on the table to help prevent the area from looking like a complete warzone, put the bread far enough out of hubby's reach so he doesn't mistake it for a simple toddler reject that must be consumed. (Sorry, Jeff!)
  

• And finally, chug a glass of red wine with the meal. It really does make everything just a little bit easier...

Fortunately, at least two of the couples seated near us were understanding and did proceed to "ooo" and "ahhh" over the little guys... but I still couldn't help feeling we were at risk of getting a standing ovation from everyone else in the place when we finally got up to leave.

But, despite the chaos, we did get a full meal in, Tyler left without getting any of it in his hair, and Austin made it home without completely losing his temper. So, I guess that still counts as a successful night out, right?

Turning Godzilla into the Sleeping Giant

When today began, the angry baby was actually not all that angry. In fact, he seemed downright content throughout the morning and most of the afternoon... but once evening came, the angry baby returned with a vengeance.

So, how do you turn an angry baby into a happy one - or at least one that's willing to fall asleep? Well, in general, we've found the following are some of Austin's favorite things:

1. Milk... lots of milk (formula actually... and lately he seems to prefer the Gentlease over his special hypo-allergenic high maintenance kind - a good sign!)
2. Being held. Austin loves to be held.
   
3. If holding him isn't doing it, then you have to add walking to the mix. The only thing Austin likes more than being held is being held by someone who's walking around.
4. Gripe water - liquid gold! (basically appears to be the equivalent of sugar water with a few herbs thrown in to make it sound really special)
5. The swaddler. We are horrible at swaddling. The arms always find their way out. But fortunately, you can buy a swaddler for dummies - it's soft and cozy for the baby with velcro enclosures for the swaddler-challenged parents. You gotta have the non-stretchy kind of swaddlers though - or he'll still wiggle his way out!
6. Someone rubbing a finger lightly across his cheek and chin while making that "Shhhhhh" sound.
   
7. A Binky. The no-brainer... but Austin doesn't always want his binky. And he seems to have inherited his mom's ultra-sensitive gag reflex. So, even when he does want the binky, he sometimes has a tough time keeping it in his mouth.
8. More milk. Just like Tyler when he was a newborn, Austin is a bit of a piggy - and he loves his milk.
   

And if none of those work, then we really are scewed until he decides to cut us a break... Fortunately, one of the those things above will usually be successful - it just might not always be the choice we were hoping for (such as wanting to be held when you want to go to sleep!)

Tonight was one of those nights when we pretty much had to go through the list to get him to agree it was time for bed. So, what does an evening with the angry baby look like? First he gets his milk... then he gets a clean diaper and swaddled. Looks content. Goes into the bassinet. A few moments pass before the warning call comes - "Nyeh". Give baby a binky. Binky promptly pops back out. Reinsert binky. It pops out. After about 5 rounds of this, the binky finally stays. For about a minute. Give up on binky. Hold baby and walk around for a few minutes. Maybe he has a bubble stuck, so try to burp baby. Small burp. Put baby back in bassinet. "Nyeh, Nyeh". Binky game replays. Take baby out of bassinet and give to hubby to snuggle with him in bed. Hubby is like a human furnace - so it seems to provide an ultra snuggly environment for angry babies - but, tonight, no dice.

Next comes the gripe water. Baby LOVES gripe water. But doesn't love when the gripe water is all gone. Finally, we give up. Solution of last resort is to give baby more milk and hope for a "milk coma" - that pleasant moment when baby falls fast asleep with an overstuffed belly, much the same way as adults pass out after a big meal on Thanksgiving day.

Judging from the silence coming from the other room, it seems we were finally successful with the milk coma approach. When in doubt, pull out the milk - Yay milk!

At least he's gradually starting to spend more of each day as a happy baby than an angry one as he gets older! And nothing give you that warm fuzzy feeling as much as when you get to see an "angry baby" smile and hear him happily coo! (and yes, he really does coo!)

The Angry Baby, Tornado Tyler. and Our Crazy World...

Welcome to our new blog - where you can learn the latest about our crazy little lives...

So, let's start by catching you up on what's happened so far. Jeff and I have 2 babies. One is now 16 months old (Tornado Tyler), and the other is 2 months old (Angry Austin). We also share our home with two bouncy, shaggy bearded collies (Max & Loki) who are both quite over the whole baby thing.

Tyler is what I assume to be a typical toddler boy. He toddles everywhere... and into anything in his way. In fact, just in time for today's picture day at school (daycare), Tyler got to sport a fresh gash on his cheek from toddling right off a toy the day before. This is in addition to the bruise on his other cheek from flipping head first into his dump truck a few days earlier. The other marks covering his face most likely originated during one of his toddles into the wall, or the table, or a dog... you get the idea, I'm sure!

From almost the moment he was born, Tyler has been a very happy (and independent) baby... Now that he's older, he's a little moodier of course - but overall, he's probably destined to be the class clown.

Austin, on the other hand, is Tyler's polar opposite. He's much more demanding, a bit more unsatisfied with his life as a baby, and generally more interested in being held and coddled than swinging in a swing or playing on a playmat.

Before Tyler graduated to Toddlerville at daycare, he shared the infant room with a baby named Elizabeth. Cute as she is, she also likes to cry a lot. So much, in fact, that it wasn't uncommon to hear her referred to as the "Angry Baby".

So, in our little world, we affectionately refer to Austin as our own little "Angry Baby". His role is playing mommy's boy to Tyler's daddy's boy... and unlike Tyler's potential future as class clown, Austin may very well be our quieter, more sensitive son.

And that's where the intro ends and this story begins...